Monday, December 24, 2007

Wax

I will be on vacation until late January. Until then, please watch one of my favorite movies. It is available in its entirety online.

Follow this link to Wax: The Discovery of Television Among the Bees.

Comments on Wax are welcome.

***

You may now download a free copy of my little chapbook Creation Stories from Happy Cobra Books. I will also have 50 print copies in late January or early February.

Monday, December 17, 2007

Pepsi

I think maybe I have so much trouble blogging because there's no money in it. Or there's no money in it for me now. But maybe I should explore some corporate sponsorship opportunities.

Let's consider this post a sort of tryout. I'll be sending the text to the good people at Pepsi to see if they would, from here on in, act as a corporate sponsor for The Man Who Couldn't Blog.

Here goes:

The Man Who Couldn't Blog is sponsored in part by Pepsi.

Pepsi: it's that burning, searing feeling in the back of your throat that tells you that it's working. Pepsi: twice a day for the rest of your life, and at the Pearly Gates, you'll be ushered past the rest of the losers and allowed to see God immediately. Pepsi: when life gives you lemons, throw the God awful things out the window and enjoy a tall, cool glass of America's second favorite bubbly, brown nut beverage. Pepsi: when all else fails, ask your grandfather for one, and he'll likely go out and buy you one because he's a very lonely old man. Pepsi: sure. Pepsi: reasonable doubt is just a sip away. Pepsi: so much more than you'd ever imagine. And also, so much less. Pepsi: who the fuck cares, when it all comes down to it. Pepsi: wild in the streets, waiting for the last great shoe to drop. Pepsi: animals in the sun, waiting for the rainy season. Pepsi: foreigners are likely looking through your window right now, so try to act cool. Pepsi: free to the next 7000 customers.

Thank you.

Soon the money will come rolling in.

***

Happy Cobra Books has finally printed a real, actual book. There's only one copy. If you are able to read this post, the book is not for you. It's for someone who can't read.

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

guitar

This guitar is small and blue.

This guitar is big a green.

This guitar is mid-sized and yellow.

All these guitars are falling off a building.

All these guitars are on their ways down.

There is nothing that can be done to stop all these guitars as they fall from the top of a building and make their way to the concrete below. They are, as they say, goners.

Oh, the questions.

Did these guitars commit suicide?

Were these guitars murdered?

Was this a freak accident?

How did the guitars climb the stairs?

Will the real guitar player ever be revealed?

Are these guitars in a standard tuning, or are they in some non-standard open tuning?

Will we be able to tell what tuning they are in when they hit the ground and their strings give one final ringing out?

Will the guitars be so pulverized—and so quickly—that no one will hear them?

The guitars will soon be here.

Stand back.

***

Also:

Monday, December 03, 2007

Patterns

Here is more from the vault of drawings I drew when I was sitting on the phone talking to people who wanted to order things from a catalog produced by a very large company that produces animated films and has multiple theme parks.

Each pattern was on a little scrap of paper.



Also, this is a drawing of Brian Jones from The Rolling Stones as a television set.



***

Two things, one to listen to, one to watch:

Willie Evans Jr.

Jeff Devo