My parents, they live in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan. (Or on the Upper Peninsula of Michigan.) It is very cold there. It is so cold in the (or on the) Upper Peninsula of Michigan that there is a permanent layer of snow.
Some people will tell you that they have seasons in the (or on the) Upper Peninsula of Michigan. They will say that, for example, this is a photo of the Upper Peninsula in the fall, and then say "See, no snow. Sometimes there's no snow."
Those people lie. Those images are as faked as the images of the moon landing.
Faked.
But, actually, now there are places in the (or on the) Upper Peninsula of Michigan without snow. Because of all this global warming you've been hearing about, seeing about, and Oscar-ing films about. Or, about which you've been hearing, seeing, or film-Oscar-ing. Something.
The permanent snow has, in some places (or on some places), melted.
It has melted and poured away, and left, and traveled through lower Michigan, and settled in Indiana of all places. There is a lake of melted Upper Michigan snow in Indiana (or on Indiana). They call it Little Lake Michigan because the water came from Michigan, but the lake is not as big as the regular Lake Michigan which, as you know, is a Great Lake. And also a great lake! It's a great Great Lake—possibly the greatest.
Indiana's beautiful, clear, blue Little Lake Michigan: it allows for boating, and for fishing, and also for water-skiing. The good people of Indiana (or on Indiana) have passed a resolution thanking the Upper Peninsula of Michigan for their generous gift of a new lake, even though the lake came there of its own free will. It seemed like a nice thing to do. People in Indiana are polite.
There is a problem. This problem is Wisconsin. The Upper Peninsula of Michigan has been attached to Wisconsin for as long as anyone can remember. Wisconsin has always been friendly to the Upper Peninsula of Michigan, even letting them root for their sports teams.
They have a very nice bay in Wisconsin. They have some nice, little lakes in Wisconsin. But they don't have one as nice as Little Lake Michigan.
They have stopped talking to the Upper Peninsula of Michigan. They have declared war on Indiana. The Wisconsinites (or Wisconsonians) are marching through Illinois on their way to Indiana, where blood will be spilled over this lake affront, or this lack of new lake front.
Many people will die in this war. The Upper Peninsula of Michigan will break free, swim out to Canada, get a job in Toronto, and never be heard from again.
War is probably not the answer. I will look for the real answer. Until then, I won't be able to blog.
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Please help, if you can.
