Zoloft

When I forget to take my Zoloft for a day or two, I get this feeling like the top half of my head is light, and the bottom half of my head is heavy. Somewhere around my eyes, my head feels stretched.

I don't know how else to describe it. Just like that: stretched.

When I forget to take my Zoloft for a week or two, and then take it again, the inside of my head buzzes loudly. If I take Zoloft after not having taken it for a week or two, and then drink my daily cup of coffee, my body jitters for a couple of hours, and I rub my face and hair a lot, and my hand shakes as I rub it along my face from bottom to top.

And I begin to feel nauseous after a couple of hours of jitters. And I drink more coffee to keep myself from wanted to nap off the rest of the day.

I have a lot to do, you see. A lot more than you'd think.

A lot.

The Scientologists have moved in across the street, and they are looking in through my window every morning, watching me take my Zoloft, judging me. Always judging me.

I yell out the window at them. I yell: Thank Xenu for Zoloft! and they go scampering back to their homes. They scamper up the trees and into the little holes they live in.

(Wait. Are those Scientologists, or squirrels? Do the Scientologists also live in trees? Am I mistaking the squirrels for Scientologists?)

They scamper, but always they look back, and always, always they judge me.

But if I don't take my Zoloft, my face stretches. And if I don't take my Zoloft, I think all day about how I'm a foot behind myself, watching myself.

And the anxiety voice yells at me all day long.

But seriously. I would never blog about something like that.